Mayor Eric Garcetti said it was time to "cancel everything," but his rules have no basis in common sense, or fairness, or science.
"My message couldn't be simpler," Garcetti said, "it's time to hunker down. It's time to cancel everything. And if it isn't essential, don't do it."
What you definitely can't do in LA
"[A]ll persons living within the City of Los Angeles are hereby ordered to remain in their homes."
"[A]ll businesses within the City of Los Angeles are ordered to cease operations that require in-person attendance by workers at a workplace."
"All public and private gatherings of any number of people from more than one household are prohibited, except for outdoor faith-based services..." However, places of worship must hold their services outside.
"All travel, including, without limitation, travel on foot, bicycle, scooter, motorcycle, automobile, or public transit is prohibited."
What you can do in LA even if it's contraindicated by what you can't do
"All healthcare operations" are open. Additionally, "personal care establishments," such as nail salons and beauty shops are allowed to operate.
"Grocery stores, water retailers," "stores that sell beer, wine, and liquor. Retail food markets..." as well as farm stands and food banks.
"Agricultural and horticultural cultivation..."
"Newspapers, television news, radio, magazine, podcast and journalism; and music, film and television production..." This includes: "Music and Video Production." Additionally, because businesses that provide essential services to essential services, anything that the "music and video production" companies need is allowed to be provided.
"Gas service stations," as well as auto and bicycle repair businesses. Public transit services are allowed to remain open, even though, as specified above, no one is to leave their homes or use public transit.
"Banks, credit unions, financial institutions and insurance companies, and pawn shops."
"Hardware and building supply stores, day labor centers, nurseries and horticulture wholesale distributors."
"Plumbers, electricians, custodial/janitorial workers, handyman services, funeral home workers and morticians, moving services, HVAC installers, carpenters, day laborers, landscapers, gardeners, exterminators, property managers and leasing agents, private security personnel and other service providers who provide services to maintain the safety, sanitation, and essential operation to properties..."
"Businesses providing mailing and shipping services, boxes and packaging, and post office boxes."
"Laundromats, dry cleaners, and laundry service providers."
Storage businesses and shipping companies, as well as "Businesses that supply other essential businesses with the support, services, or supplies necessary to operate..." This includes "businesses renting outdoor for transportation and/or physical activities."
Things that make no sense in LA
Restaurants are open for take-out only. Breweries and wineries are open for retail only. But "office-based businesses" are allowed to be open, as are manufacturers of retail goods and retail shops.
All Los Angeles public schools are closed to in-person learning, as are colleges and universities, even though day camps and childcare is open. Childcare facilities are open, as are day camps. Libraries are open so long as they are not at a school.
Parks and trails and open, but playgrounds are closed. All programming at parks is closed, although youth sports are permitted. Golf, tennis, and pickleball are allowed at parks facilities. Beaches are open but not for sunbathing or sitting and piers are closed. Public pools are closed. Gyms are open. Pro sports can operate, with no spectators.
Non-essential businesses must close even if there's no definition for what that means
Even though, given the above restrictions and permissions, it is unclear as to what essential businesses are defined as and how a business owner can determine that they are non-essential is also unclear, the order states that:
"Businesses regarded under this Order as 'nonessential' may be permitted to conduct minimum basic operations including inventory, security, custodial services, payroll and employee benefits processing, and any reasonable activity designed to maximize the ability for its employees to work remotely from their homes.
"Any Non-Essential Businesses conducting minimum basic operations, as allowed for in the paragraph, shall keep its doors closed and locked to the public at all times and shall post a sign on its main entrances stating that the business is closed to the public."
Penalties for non-compliance
Violations of the order will be punished, and "shall constitute a misdemeanor subject to fines and imprisonment."
Garcetti then urges "the Los Angeles Police Department and the City Attorney to vigorously enforce this Order."
Garcetti threatens to turn off the water and utilities to anyone who does not comply: "individuals, businesses, and properties which fail to comply with this Order may be subject to having their utility services shut off by the Department of Water and Power."
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